The Magic And Simplicity Of Building Self-esteem
Rick London
There is nothing better for self-esteem than building self-esteem. As strange as that sounds, it is that simple.
A lot of people think that one has to be either born with self-esteem, or maybe was popular in high-school and held onto that for the rest of their lives, always succeeding at whatever due to public support. The truth is, nothing could be further from the truth.
This is actually not the case at all. The beauty you had a crush on in high school who maybe relied mainly on beauty for self-esteem later becomes an adult, has children and stretch marks, and a bad marriage. She escapes into television and maybe chemical dependence. It doesn't always happen that way, but more regularly than you may think.
Much is expected of children of successful and/or famous parents. One thinks this may give them a "free ride" onto the high self-esteem track when it usually does just the opposite. In fact, many rebel and get into destructive habits to find their own voice, and never grow out of it. No self-esteem found here
I will go back to basics. Self-esteem can do wonders for your self-esteem. That might not make sense if you feel your self-esteem has diminished for whatever reason. My point is, it can be learned for the first time, or re-learned in a whole new fashion.
Maybe you were the star athelete and wore the right clothes, made applauded every time you through a touchdown pass. You kept your grades up and you got consistent positive feedback. This helped your esteem. That is often how we get it early in life. But it is no longer that way in adulthood. Later in life, you landed a high paying marketing job and you hate it. The pay all goes to an ungrateful wife who spends it on fashions and takes vacations with her group of friends. And took your self-esteem with them, while you stayed home and drank beer and watched the game on television.
We have an obligation to ourselves in adulthood to create our own self-esteem. We rarely get much unconditional love, attention, and acknowledgment of our deeds we did when we were younger (unless we have a dog). It won't be done overnight. But each time we do something positive for ourselves or someone else, it builds. It is a process.
It may mean, on a day you are feeling lowest, you pick yourself up and go to a soup kitchen and volunteer. Maybe a nursing home and visit with the elderly. Tutor a kid with his/her homework. Do something positive to get outside of yourself. You will not get back your self-esteem most likely in one day. But if you find yourself making it a habit of helping others, you will slowly find your self-esteem rising. It is a natural consequence of helping others and getting outside oneself. Maybe it's physics. Maybe its the way the universe operates. But it works for many.
Iwith depression and low-self-esteem since my teen years (even when I was a popular kid). I always felt alone, even with people. Then I grew up. I became an adult. All of a sudden I was in my late forties. How did it all happen so fast. It was a blur. But now, I'd had a major heart attack and I was keenly aware of my mortality. Heart attack? That was what other people had, not me. I guess everyone thinks that. So I took a week and analyzed my life. I took, (as Richard Dreyfus' book in 'What About Bob?', baby steps. I studied. I researched. I learned. I even went back to college online. Online colleges lured some of them and they continue to study.
Adulthood has been my first stab at self-esteem. I never could manage to do it in my youth. Now I have a few tools.
Many people have had it much rougher than me. I have endured much in my life including homelessness, and I am certain there are many others who have even meaner stories, so if I can do it, anyone can. I just take a little time out of each day and do something positive, or create something, work on one of my projects, write a story like this one, to build my self-esteem. I may miss the mark some of the time, but I try to learn to do it right the next time, and still, I take time for myself to do just a little something positive for me or someone else, or both, for no pay, even if they insist.
In a decade, these little deeds have made me a better person and I've accomplished much in my personal and professional life.
I created the largest cartoon site o the Internet which makes people feel good. I then launched nine gift stores; LTSuperstore, RickLondonCollection, Justfunnygreetingcards,Justfunnycoffeemugs, Justfunnyaprons, Mirthgirthbirth, RickLondonwear, Justfunnymousepads, Justfunnyhoodies, etc. Surfers stop at my stores and often order either for themselves or a friend or family member. Laughter is a great self-esteem builder and is quite bonding.
Exposing ourselves to humor helps us be more light-hearted. We learn to "wear the world like a loose-fitting garment". If you do not feel you are a funny person, no problem. Just try to expose yourself to something or someone humorous as often as you can.In time dramatic changes can happen and you will like them. I know that I did and I'm a very slow student. Eventually, even for me, it happened and is happening still.
So, as I said, self-esteem can do wonders for your self-esteem. Build some today. Baby steps.
Cartoonist Rick London battled depression and low self-esteem for years. He has since taken a path to higher self-esteem. He makes others laugh with his cartoon merchandise stores and Londons Times Cartoons http://www.londonstimes.us) Easy Self-Esteem: Even If You've Never Had It
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