Get Back Your Ex Now!
Erik J. Michaels
Going through a breakup is rarely anyone's idea of a good time...for a lot of people it's almost impossible to overcome, and they just sit around on the couch for a month or two, moaning into one gallon bucket of ice cream after another. If that's how you want to live your life, cool...go right ahead. Otherwise, have a look at what I have to say.
Your first step to getting your ex back needs to be changing your mind, and your outlook on life. We generally change our minds about 30 times a day anyways, so put that skill to use. If you take the wrong perceptual approach to a breakup, you're just going to sink into depression and gain nothing from the pain. If you look at it the right way, however, you can forge that raw feeling into something that really helps you turn things around: motivation.
Stop looking at things from the perspective of a victim. Whether you're considering yourself a victim of your ex's unfairness and wrath or a victim of your own mistakes, you're still playing the victim...and what happens to victims? They get victimized! I imagine I've said the word "victim" enough times to make you tired of it, so stop being one!
Take the hurt you've felt from the breakup and use it to fuel your efforts at getting your ex back. Nothing is better motivation for fixing a problem than fully realizing the consequences of NOT fixing it. You've felt the pain of a breakup, so take steps to NOT feel that pain anymore!
Take all that wasted energy you're pouring into Ben and Jerry's laps and fire up the ol' thinktank. Figure out just what it was that caused your relationship to end up failing, and think about how you can fix them. Problems range from big to small, and usually a relationship that's fallen through has more than just a couple. It's a steep job to come up with everything that went wrong, so instead make a list of what went wrong that you can do something about.
After finding your biggest problems, the next step becomes to do something about them. Some things should be easy, like working on your general neatness (big problem with guys). Some things are a bit tougher and may be limited by uncontrollable factors in your lifestyle, such as your job demanding a lot of your time and not leaving much for your significant other. Whatever the case, you do need to figure them out, and quick.
Once the main issues have been settled or at least are on their way to being settled, the next step is to break back into contact with your ex. You might even still be in contact, but chances are you haven't talked to each other in a while, so usually a good "ice rebreaker" is a short phone call or email seeing how he/she is doing. Remember to keep things light for a while, and just work up slowly from whatever point you get to. Rushing things is the best way to mess them up, so pace things with how your ex is feeling.
Your ex isn't your enemy...unless you have a movie-case of "Evil Ex of Doom"...but I doubt that's the case if you're reading this particular article. Really, your ex probably still loves you and wishes you could be together, but is overwhelmed by the problems that flew around while you were together. If you can fix the problems or show your ex that you are fixing them, there's a pretty healthy chance that things can pick back up and go relatively smoothly. There's always an exception, but you have a good shot at happiness if you just work to get it, so get motivated!
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