Homer Simpson and His Deep, Deep Thoughts.
Aazdak Alisimo
There is little doubt that the sayings of Homer Simpson have become food for fodder and deep thought in today's pop culture. I am not sure what that says about us, but a religion based on his weekly humor can't be far off. Here are a few choice samples:
Marge: Homer, the plant called. They said if you don't show up tomorrow don't bother showing up on Monday. Homer: Woo-hoo. Four-day weekend.
Maybe, just once, someone will call me 'Sir' without adding, 'You're making a scene.'
Lisa, if you don't like your job you don't strike. You just go in every day and do it really half-assed. That's the American way.
I'm going to the back seat of my car, with the woman I love, and I won't be back for ten minutes!
Lisa, if the Bible has taught us nothing else, and it hasn't, it's that girls should stick to girls sports, such as hot oil wrestling and foxy boxing and such and such.
I like my beer cold, my TV loud and my homosexuals flaming.
I want to share something with you: The three little sentences that will get you through life. Number 1: Cover for me. Number 2: Oh, good idea, Boss! Number 3: It was like that when I got here.
Dear Lord.. The gods have been good to me. For the first time in my life, everything is absolutely perfect just the way it is. So here's the deal: You freeze everything the way it is, and I won't ask for anything more. If that is OK, please give me absolutely no sign. OK, deal.
If something goes wrong at the plant, blame the guy who can't speak English.
America's health care system is second only to Japan, Canada, Sweden, Great Britain, well...all of Europe. But you can thank your lucky stars we don't live in Paraguay!
If something's hard to do, then it's not worth doing
Lisa, Vampires are make-believe, like elves, gremlins, and eskimos.
Now what is a wedding? Well, Webster's dictionary describes a wedding as the process of removing weeds from one's garden.
I'm a white male, age 18 to 49. Everyone listens to me, no matter how dumb my suggestions are.
Shut up, brain, or I'll stab you with a Q-Tip!
Aazdak Alisimo absolutely loves the Simpsons and any source of http://www.funnyquotesdaily.com/ funny quotes, which he collects for FunnyQuotesDaily.com. Don't reprint this exact article. Instead, reprint a free http://www.uberarticles.com/?id=35805&b=79 unique content version of this same article.
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