Contrary: Dealing with Polarity Responders
Kenrick Cleveland
What's a polarity responder? We've all had dealings with them. They are someone who no matter what the situation, statement or issue at hand, has to respond in opposition. 'It's a beautiful day.'
Polarity Responder: 'It's definitely too hot. And I think there might be a few clouds on the horizon.'
Polarity responders are easy to spot and they're incredibly fun to deal with. I give them something to respond to that's to my advantage.
The next time you're eliciting criteria, look for the words 'different' or 'difference'. Polarity responders will use these often. They are incredibly 'difference' oriented, as in they will always see things the opposite of you in most or all matters.
If you have a disruptive employee or teenager or client who is a polarity responder, try this: 'Would you do me a favor?' PR: 'Sure. What can I do for you?'
'Only if you want to, you don't have to.'
PR: 'No. What is it? What is it?'
'Okay, what I wanted to ask you is, would you listen closely to what's going on and if you hear that I've ever said something that isn't quite in keeping with what you think should be going on here, would you bring it to my attention right away?'
PR: 'Oh, well, absolutely. But what you're saying is great. After all you really know your stuff.'
'Well, I know, but I know you're going to find something so I want you just to bring it to my attention.'
Now this polarity responder is caught in a trap. If they bring it to your attention, they've done what you've asked. If they don't bring it to your attention then they haven't done their polarity. So either way you win. This keeps them from going into their polarity response. They can sit back and sort of enjoy. They're trying to listen really closely to what's going on so that they may come with one or two things for you.
PR: 'Well, you know, you said this and I was curious why.'
'That's incredibly important. I'm glad you noticed this. I knew there was no way you couldn't bring that up so I'm really glad you did.'
Well now, are they going to bring up the next thing? No. Because they're going to fear that you're going to say, 'I knew you were going to bring that up too' and that pisses them off. They can't stay in their polarity response so they just go forget it.
Utilizing patterns to your advantage is the key to persuasion and this is a really easy one to counteract. In this situation, my intention is to diffuse their pattern so it doesn't obstruct anyone else either.
Kenrick Cleveland teaches techniques to earn the business of affluent clients using http://www.maxpersuasion.com/ persuasion. He runs public and private seminars and offers home study courses and coaching programs in http://www.maxpersuasion.com/ persuasion techniques. Click here for other http://www.uberarticles.com/?id=25834&b=79 unique 'persuasion' articles.
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