Most children hate doing homework; it restricts their freedom to play and is a grim reminder of school. They wonder why school has to continue at home also. So, it is quite normal for children to put up some kind of a fuss, which could be gentle grumbling or outright refusal.
While the parents and teachers are farsighted and insist on studying, you cannot expect such wisdom from a small child who lives in the moment and wants to make the best of it by having fun. Moreover, if the child finds the work difficult, then the whole exercise becomes all the more demoralizing and discouraging. No wonder, children would prefer to do anything other than homework.
So, you will have to do some homework on your part before you can get your child to do the classwork at home. You need to present it in such an interesting manner that it transforms the child's way of thinking and outbalances all the negatives. However, don't expect your child to be enthusiastic about it, but at least bring him to a point when he accepts the necessary evil and thinks it is better to get it done and be finished with it than to go on lingering on the unsavory prospect of it.
How do you achieve that? Here are some suggestions:
1. Don't fight with your child. Yelling at them to do their homework probably won't work, and will just frustrate and infuriate yourself, your child, and the neighbors. Instead, be pro-active by setting up the home environment and routines so as to encourage good study habits. Focus on rewards rather than punishments.
2. If your child finds it difficult to complete the daily assignments given, check with the school about how much homework is expected and how long it should take. In case of genuine difficulty, consult the teacher and follow the instructions. As a rule your child should not be spending more than an hour on homework. More than that would be drudgery and difficult to do after a full day at school.
3. Create a place that is conducive to working. It is hard to get homework done if you have to do it on your lap while everyone else is watching TV. Maybe have a rule about no TV until everyone's homework is done. Make a cleared space on the kitchen table, or a table or desk in her bedroom, that is clear from distractions and interruptions. Ideally set up an area that is exclusive to your child.
4. Provide help and support. Don't do it for them, but do help them to get started, or to find the books they need. If they need to do some research on the internet, maybe sit with them and help them find the info they need. Answer their spelling questions (unless it is a spelling test!) If they are having problems with math, work through the problem with them. Above all, though, stay calm! Getting frustrated with the inability to solve obviously simple questions won't help!
5. Be generous in appreciating every single achievement no matter how small it is. First focus on getting the homework done, then start to focus on quality. Let that be the teacher's responsibility; you remain confined to the homework only. Your efforts should be directed towards inculcating diligence and persistence. However, you can ask your child to read his work out loud so as to catch obvious mistakes and correct them.
6. If necessary, set up a reward chart that explicitly rewards homework completion by means of extra privileges, such as TV, or family treats or activities. Again, focus first on rewarding the regular completion of work. Later on you can reward higher grades. Setting up a regular schedule is often helpful.
7. There may be a specific subject that is causing problems. For that you need to see the teacher and take her help and guidance to work on the deficient areas.
8. Often, the long-term projects become too unwieldy and burdensome. You can help your child break it down into smaller chunks for which you can set realistic goals and deadlines. This will help in getting the work done as well teach your child how to organize and plan.
9. Investigate whether the school has a homework club. Many schools provide a facility for children to stay on after the end of the day to complete their homework in a supervised setting. Often children find it easier to do that, than to try to fit in their homework at home around other family members, TV, meals and all the other distractions.
10. Finally, it is important to give the taste of success to your child. Failure is extremely discouraging and de-motivating. Success has its own charm; it is self-motivating and encourages more attempts. Once you achieve that, you will never have to bother about your child's homework again.
Dr. Noel Swanson is a leading expert on child behavior problems. He has a fascinating website with lots of expert parenting advice that is worth visiting. More of his articles can be found here: free articles on parenting Don't reprint this exact article. Instead, reprint a free unique content version of this same article.
|